Our Song

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WARNING! This story contains extremely dubious consent and an attempted suicide. If you’re not comfortable with that please back out now. Otherwise enjoy!

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, businesses, places, events, locales, and incidents are either the products of the author’s imagination or used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental.

+++

The bell rings and I hurriedly rush out of class. Today is my 18th birthday and my brother promised me he would spend the entire day with me.

My brother Lucas was 18 and I was 8 when my parents died in a car crash. Ever since, he’s been my primary caretaker. The money our parents left didn’t last long so my brother dropped out of high school so he could take care of me. I love him more than anything in the world.

I meet up with my girlfriends outside the school and we mill about, gossiping and giggling as I wait for my brother to show up. He promised he’d take the day off for me but I’m still worried he won’t arrive. I wave goodbye to my boyfriend Reese as he drives away. He hadn’t been happy when I told him I couldn’t spend my birthday with him but he knows how important my brother is to me. I hope he won’t hold it against me.

The crowd dwindles as time ticks on and finally my brother pulls up in his beat up Prius. I beam at him as he rolls down the window. Behind me I hear girls whispering and giggling.

My brother has never lacked female attention. At 6’5 he’s over a foot taller than me and muscular from construction work. He has messy dark hair and piercing blue eyes that match mine. We have the same dark hair and blue eyes but he’s tanned from work in the sun. People have told us we look alike, but other than the eyes I don’t see it. At 5’4, I’m petite, with small breasts and long legs, and my heart-shaped face has nothing in common with his sharp jawline and high cheekbones.

I bid goodbye to my remaining girlfriends and let myself in on the passenger side. I buckle my seatbelt and lean over to give my brother a kiss on the cheek. I’m buzzing with excitement. My brother smiles and runs a hand through my hair, I lean into his touch, thrilled by the small display of affection. We’ve always been close but the past few months he’s been distant, keeping his distance from me and I don’t know why.

He’s going to take me into the city. We’re going to go shopping, where he’s promised to buy me anything I want, then dinner and a movie. It doesn’t sound like much but we’re saving up for college and we usually can’t afford such luxuries. I’ve been wanting to buy a new dress for ages and I can’t wait.

He takes me to the biggest shopping mall in the city and I spend forever browsing the shops, looking at beauty products and clothes. Lucas watches me with a lazy eye as I try on dresses and skirts until I finally pick out a white-and-yellow sundress that’s not too expensive.

But when I head towards Victoria’s Secret Lucas halts me with a hand on my arm.

“Where are you going?” he asks.

“To Victoria’s Secret,” I say, trying to squirm out of his grasp but his hold on me is firm.

“Why would you need to go there?” he asks, frowning.

“To buy underwear,” I say, rolling my eyes. He still doesn’t seem to get it. For such a womanizer, he can be remarkably dense. “Reese and I have been waiting for me to turn 18 so we can have sex.”

His eyes seem to bulge out of his head. A vein pops on his forehead and his face turns red with fury. “Absolutely not.”

“I’m 18 now,” I protest. “I’m not your little girl anymore.”

“Like hell you’re not,” he says. He starts dragging me away from the store but I dig in my heels stubbornly.

His grip is savage as he yanks at me. Lucas has never acted this way before, he’s always been so gentle and supportive. “You’re hurting me,” I gasp.

Immediately, he lets go and I skid to a halt. His expression is horrified as he turns toward me. “Mel…” he trails off.

“I’m fine,” I say. And I am. The shock of it had hurt more than his actual grip. “It’s just you promised me anything.” When he still hesitates I look up at him through my eyelashes and bite my lip in the way I know he can’t resist.

Lucas seems to struggle with himself for several moments. “Fine,” he says at last. Reluctantly, he follows me into the pink store.

Inside, it smells like fruits and floral and everything feminine. I make a dive towards the rows of lingerie and examine them closely. Finally I pick out a lacy pink set I know Reese will love. All the while, Lucas stands in a corner, glowering. Even with that savage expression twisting his face he draws appreciative looks from passing customers.

When we go to check out, the cashier smiles at us. “For your girlfriend?” she asks. Lucas grunts and I smile awkwardly, too embarrassed to correct her.

At the theatre we buy tickets to the latest big budget superhero flick. I love superhero movies but I’ve never seen one bostancı escort bayan on the big screen before. I enjoy every moment, even the commercials in the beginning, gasping and laughing at all the right moments. When the hero’s mother dies in the climax, I’m uncomfortably reminded of my own mother. Upset, I reach out for Lucas and he takes my hand in his strong grip and doesn’t let go for the rest of the movie.

We’re still holding hands as we walk out of the movie. I’m babbling excitedly about all my favorite moments and what the post-credit scene means for the movie’s extended universe.

Lucas takes me to my favorite restaurant for dinner, an Italian pizza place, nothing too fancy, but I love the place to pieces. We order half-cheese for me and half-Meat Lovers’ for him. There’s just the right amount of tomato sauce and the cheese practically melts in my mouth. I close my eyes in bliss at the taste and open them to see my brother staring at me with an odd expression on his face.

I hungrily demolish my half of the pizza. Lucas smiles but he doesn’t tease me for my appetite. He finishes his half off more slowly. We pay and I pretend not to notice as Lucas carefully counts out his change.

I’m elated. I haven’t had a better day for ages and the best part is I got to spend it entirely with my brother. I have to stop myself from skipping as we head up to our small apartment. We’ve lived here ever since Lucas sold the house we grew up in with our parents. It’s just one room with a kitchen and a bathroom attached. Lucas and I share a bed for convenience’s sake. I know most people wouldn’t like sharing a room with their brother, much less a bed, but I find sleeping with Lucas comforting.

I hurry to the bathroom to try on my new underwear. I examine myself in the mirror. The bra pushes out my boobs and makes them look bigger and the underwear hugs my ass nicely. I take a picture to show my girlfriends but I want the underwear to be a surprise for Reese.

You look gorgeous girl!!! Rachel responds in seconds. I respond with a kissy face. Then, I text Reese I have a surprise for you tomorrow ;). When he doesn’t respond immediately I turn my phone off. I realize I forgot my pajamas so I head outside in my underwear. Lucas looks up when he hears the door open.

“What do you think?” I ask playfully, spreading out my arms to give him a good look. I bend over and shuffle through the bottom drawer looking for my pajamas. I look up when I find them. “Good,” he says, coughing.

When he continues coughing, I frown. I hope he’s not coming down with anything. I approach him and place a hand on his forehead, worried. His skin is warm, but not overly so. “Are you okay?” I ask.

“Fine,” he says. I examine his face carefully but he looks fine. I realize my hand is still resting on his forehead and I make a move to remove it but Lucas grabs my wrist.

Before I realize what’s happening his lips are on mine. For a second, his lips are pressed against mine, warm and soft, then he’s pulling away.

I stand there for a second, dazed. He releases my wrist and I back away from him, nearly stumbling over my own feet. Without saying anything, I hurry into the bathroom and slam the door behind me. My heart is pounding. What was that?

I take several deep breaths, forcing myself to calm. In some cultures, siblings kiss on the mouth. It was probably nothing.

When I finally venture outside the lights are off and Lucas is in bed, seemingly asleep. For the first time, I feel some trepidation as I get into bed with him. His back is to me and I curl onto the edge of the bed with my back to him. “Good night,” I whisper into the darkness.

+++

When I wake I’ve nearly forgotten about Lucas kissing me. While we were sleeping he’s curled up against me. My nightshirt has hiked up and his hand is resting on the bare skin of my stomach. I flush when I realize his hot erection is pressing against my butt. That happens sometimes. Lucas is a man and it’s a natural reaction. I think he’s asleep, his breath is steady as it hits my neck, so the situation isn’t as awkward as it could be.

I turn onto my back so his erection isn’t pressing against me anymore and stretch. Getting up, I pounce on Lucas and start tickling him. Immediately, Lucas’s arms reach out to grab my tickling hands. Giggling, I flop on his body. He sighs in my ear but I can hear the smile in his voice. I can feel his abs beneath the shirt he wears to sleep. He’s all hardness everywhere I’m soft. “Good morning,” I say cheerfully.

“Morning,” he grunts. Lucas lies back and watches me as I pad to the bathroom, yawning.

I brush my teeth and wash my face. I put on makeup and take a long time brushing out my hair, making sure it’s shining. Lucas is yelling that I’m going to be late for school by the time I get out. He glares at me as he slams the door.

I clip off the tags and slip on my new dress and underwear. I experiment with putting up my hair before deciding to let ümraniye escort it fall around my shoulders. I fuss over my appearance as Lucas finishes in the bathroom.

“You look fine,” he grunts when he sees me staring at my phone camera. I keep my back turned to him as he changes.

Lucas grabs the keys and I follow him out the door. As we drive towards the school I notice he looks tense somehow. The set of his shoulders is stiff and he’s glaring at nothing in particular.

When we pull up in front of the school he stops me as I move to get out. “What is it?” I ask.

Instead of answering he pulls me close and kisses me on the forehead. His lips linger for a moment too long before he pulls away. He stares into my eyes. “Be careful,” he says.

I nod. That must be why he’s been so weird. He’s worried about me having sex with Reese. “It’s okay. Reese is bringing a condom and we’ll be safe.”

Lucas’s fingers tighten around my arm momentarily before he lets me go. When I turn around at the school entrance I see him, still parked right there. I lift my hand and wave at him.

+++

There’s an intensity to Reese when he kisses me today. I’m excited myself, but also nervous. I can barely pay attention during classes.

Reese attacks me the second the bell rings. When he presses against me I feel his erection against my leg. I text Lucas to let him know I’m going home with Reese, though he probably knows already.

He keeps a hand on my knee the entire drive towards his house. Reese’s mother greets us at the door and offers us snacks and refreshments. I sip lemonade as I chat with Mrs Richardson. She’s actually really sweet but I can tell how impatient Reese is. It’s not long before he’s leading me away.

He takes me to his room and locks the door. And just like that we’re alone. Before I have time to tell Reese that I’ve changed my mind, he’s on me. He kisses me for several moments before reaching for my dress. To my disappointment he doesn’t seem to notice my new underwear before shucking it off. He pushes me towards his bed and I sit down heavily as he fumbles with his belt buckle.

He takes off his shirt and underwear and before I get a chance to admire his muscular physique he falls on me. He kisses me some more and reaches down to stroke me roughly, his fingers clumsy. Before I know it he’s sliding a condom down his erection and lining himself up at my entrance.

Is this it? I don’t feel ready but before I can protest he’s pushing into me.

I’m wet but not overly so and his entry burns. I gasp as he stretches me. Tears spring up in my eyes but he doesn’t seem to notice. He’s thrusting in and out of me. I close my eyes and grit my teeth until he comes in the condom with a groan. He collapses on top of me, panting.

“That was amazing,” he says. My answering smile must not have been very convincing because he has the grace to look guilty. “Did you not come?”

How could I possibly come from a few thrusts in and out? Reese reaches down and plays with my clit clumsily until I pretend to orgasm just to make it end.

Afterwards, it’s awkward. He offers to take a shower with me but I turn him down. He frowns at me, looking like a kicked puppy. We take showers separately. Then I help him change his bloody sheets. I sit there and watch him play video games for a while before the sky starts to turn dark and his mom is knocking on the door.

I flush at her reappearance. There’s a knowing look in her eyes and I hope she didn’t hear Reese’s grunts and groans.

Reese drives me home and drops me off outside my apartment. He kisses me goodbye but I quickly pull away. When I unlock the door to our apartment it’s dark and empty. I frown. Lucas is usually home by this time.

I check my phone. No new texts. I text him again to let him know I’m home then set the phone aside to work on my homework.

When I check my phone a couple hours later there are still no new texts from Lucas. I’m getting really worried now. I call him but no one picks up. I text him a couple more times. After waiting a while I start calling a few of his friends. Finally Alan lets me know that Lucas is at a club downtown. He’s been drinking. A lot.

I’m beyond pissed. I know Lucas drinks sometimes and I don’t begrudge him that but we don’t really have the money for him to be drinking himself into a stupor. I have to take a bus downtown to go get him. Outside the bar, I skip the line and tell the bouncer that I just want to go in and get my brother. He gives me a once over, leering, before letting me in without asking for my ID.

Inside the nightclub is dark and pulsing. All around are strangers grinding up against each other. I feel more than one pair of hands groping my hips and ass but I push through to the bar.

There, I finally spot Lucas. He’s seated at the bar with a drink before him and a big-titted brunette writhing on his lap. He has one of her breasts in his mouth. I wrinkle my nose in distaste. Alan is with him, a curvy kartal escort blonde on his lap.

When Lucas sees me he practically shoves the brunette off his lap. She stumbles before catching herself, looking extremely offended. “Melody!” Lucas yells over the sound of the music.

Reluctantly, I wind my way over to him. When I’m within arm’s reach Lucas grabs me and pulls me onto his lap. He plants a wet kiss on my cheek which I wipe away. I can feel the erection the brunette gave him against my back.

“Who is this?” the brunette demands, still offended.

“His sister,” I reply wearily. At my words, the brunette visibly relaxes. “Aren’t you a cute little thing?” she coos, pinching my cheek.

I already dislike this lady. I turn to Lucas. “Can we leave?” I ask.

At least he agrees easily enough. He downs his drink in one gulp, then turns to pay his tab. I frown when I see the figure at the bottom but I don’t say anything.

Lucas doesn’t spare the brunette a passing glance as he leaves. He’s steady enough on his feet but I don’t trust him driving. I’m not the best driver but I do have my learner’s permit.

I’m silent as we drive home even though I want to start screaming at him. I’m still fuming as I open the door to our apartment and let us in.

My new dress smells like sex, alcohol and sweat now. Great. I undo the zipper and shimmy out of it. The dress falls to my feet. Suddenly I feel arms wrapping around my waist. I freeze and Lucas pulls me back against his chest. I feel his erection against me and his hot breath on my neck.

No…he’s not supposed to do this. I start struggling then stop when I feel his erection twitch and hear his moan in my ear.

I stand there, frozen, as he trails his lips down my neck. His hands roam over my body, stopping to grope and knead my breasts through my lacy bra.

“Baby, you look so good,” he moans in my ear. “I’ve been thinking about how you look in that little getup all fucking day.”

I turn my head slightly and Lucas seems to take that as an invitation to kiss me. His mouth falls on mine, hot and hungry. I can taste the alcohol on his tongue as his mouth devours mine.

Instinctive revulsion churns my stomach. I try to jerk away from him but he follows me with his mouth. I push and shove until finally he lets me go and I scramble away from him. I back up until I hit the wall, staring at him with wide eyes.

“Mel…” Lucas steps forward then stops when I flinch. His face is distorted with agony.

“Fuck,” he says, falling to his knees and burying his face in his hands. “I’ve ruined everything.”

I can’t stand to see his pain. Slowly, I ease forward and approach him as if he were a wild animal. Carefully, I wrap my fingers in his hair and hug his head to my stomach. Immediately, Lucas’s arms come to wrap around my middle, clinging to me desperately.

“I love you, I love you so much,” his words are muffled against my skin. He plants a kiss on my bare stomach and I jerk back.

With a roar he releases me and starts pacing back and forth. “Look at you,” he spits. “You’re disgusted, you can barely look at me.”

I track his movement with my eyes, one arm held to my breasts, as if to hide my lacy bra from view.

Just as suddenly, his fury turns to pleas. “Mel, baby, say you want me. We’re made for each other, I know it. No one can love you like I can.”

I have to force the words out. “I’m your sister.”

“I know!” Lucas roars before visibly forcing himself to calm. “I know,” he repeats more steadily.

I eye him warily as he approaches me. He grabs my chin, tilting my face up to look at him. He searches my face for something.

Finally, he lets me go, cursing. He grabs the keys off the table and heads towards the door.

“Wait! Where are you going?” I hurry after him and grab his arm.

“Out!” he jerks his arm from my grip. I blink. His rejection stings.

“You can’t go out like this!” I touch his arm gently. When he hesitates I soften my voice. “Please don’t go.”

I lead him towards the bed and sit down next to him. I run my hand through his messy hair. When he looks at me his eyes are red.

“I’m sick. I’m in love with my own sister. I’ve tried and tried to make these feelings go away but anytime I’m with someone else all I can think about is you,” he laughs bitterly. “You don’t deserve someone like me.”

“No,” I protest. “I love you, Lucas, I love you more than anyone.”

“But not the way I love you,” he says sadly. He tucks a strand of hair behind my ear.

“Can we just go to sleep?” I whisper.

“Yeah, baby, we can,” he kisses me on the forehead.

I go into the bathroom to change into my pajamas. When I come back out he’s lying in bed, looking so broken that my heart aches.

I go to curl up in his arms. I can feel his erection, hot and throbbing against my belly but I ignore it. Instead I stroke his hair and plant soft kisses on his face until his breathing evens out and we both fall asleep.

+++

Lucas doesn’t seem to remember anything from last night and I follow his lead. My classes pass in a blur. All I can think about is Lucas. This doesn’t have to change anything between us. No matter what happens I still love him more than anything.

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